July 17, 2009
I Should Hide my Carbon Fiber Bicycle
Have you noticed how the supposed taxes on carbon dioxide are actually a tax on carbon content?
That's a big fucking difference. Everything has carbon content. Even that slowly degrading two million year old catfish fossil buried in your yard is emitting carbon through radioactive beta decay.
You'd better be prepared to pay a tax on that, homies. And a hell of a lot more. Because carbon is the 4th most abundant element in the fucking universe.
The fact is, they won't stop with taxes on carbon dioxide emissions. They're going to tax the carbon before it ever changes state. From your expected next exhalation to your carbon-based life form pet.
Crazy? I set aside my chortles of derision a long time ago when it comes to this crowd. Nothing they can do, including taxing my goddamn farts, would surprise me.
Next!
Nothing they can do, including taxing my goddamn farts, would surprise me.
Me neither...because it's all about the new national policy of rewarding laziness, punishing initiative, and exerting total control over the masses. Viewed in that light, it all makes perfect sense.
Posted by: Grumpy Old Ham at July 18, 2009 7:34 AMThat goes for Glocks as well as bicycles...
Posted by: Sam at July 18, 2009 8:54 AMOh, hell, why don't they just tax the whole Periodic Table of Elements?
Ya hadda say it and give 'em the idea, dang it!
Next on the O-Genda: the fart tax!
Posted by: Elisson at July 18, 2009 12:46 PMI wonder how much carbon a forty round clip of 5.56 fmj will emit, when sprayed methodically into--- let's say--, any politician's, h-ome.
Yep, I've had enough of these cocksuckers. I fucking dare 'em to pass that piece of trash.
And just what the fuck are you doing with a carbon fiber bicycle? Fuck... Next thing ya know, you're gonna be telling us about the groovy fucking latte' ya had at Starbucks.
If you have one of those bikeracks on your Audi, I don't want to know about it.
Hell, Dick. The carbon fiber bike is my old bike. I ride on the splendor of titanium thesa days.
Posted by: Velociman at July 18, 2009 7:21 PMMmmm, titanium. I still need to buy my titanium spork.
Because I am that fucking geeky.
Posted by: Randy Rager at July 18, 2009 7:31 PMToo hi-tech for me. I'll stick with bricks and sticks.
Posted by: dick at July 18, 2009 7:33 PMWay ahead of you, my friend, as my blog can attest. In development: Carbon Footpring Reducing Suppositiories. In research in the CaptainSQL Marketing Labs: the above shaped like Al Gore.
Posted by: Cappy at July 18, 2009 7:54 PMCarbon Footpring Reducing Suppositories? Do they make flames shoot out your tailpipe? I'd buy them if they did that!
... but shaped like Al Gore? That dude's head is too big to fit up there comfortably and might rip something out. For sure it would at least cause irritation. My ass is getting irritated just thinking about him.
Posted by: PeggyU at July 19, 2009 3:31 AMbesides which, if memory serves, in science class WE were described as carbon based life forms. Oh - that's right, they ALREADY tax us for living, don't they.
Posted by: j3 at July 19, 2009 6:12 PMDo they make Titanium sporks? Cause I eat alot of cole slaw!
Posted by: Mockingbird at July 20, 2009 4:27 PMIts the carbon content in fuels that gets taxed.
Posted by: vince at August 6, 2009 8:17 AM