Velociworld

Knuckle Draggers' Interregnum

Nothing brings out the pacifist in me like superior firepower. When you are the boogey man, what could possibly be hiding under your metaphysical bed? Like the Strategic Air Command, our Christmas mission statement was Peace Through Strength - Victory Through Devastation.

Key's poppa broke out a few play purties in honor of the mission.

First up was the FAL (Fusil Automatique Léger), the venerable NATO light assault rifle:

This little beastie, chambered in .308, was incredibly accurate using the bipod, but far more fun fired Tony Montana style.

The other big toy was a Smith & Wesson 500 .50 caliber magnum, "The Most Powerful Production Revolver in the World", which, of course, would "blow your head clean off":

Shooting the 500 is like slapping a whore: the first couple of times are shamefully exciting, but after that you wonder what the point is. This thing is made to hunt 2 things: bear and homo sapiens. Anything else is small game, best handled with a more appropriate weapon.

Did Santy bring me one of these toys? Nein. Do I want one? Nah. A little testosterone goes a long way, after all. And terrifed chipmunks aren't exactly the most dangerous prey.

Still, fun to play with, especially with sippy cups of whiskey on hand (Safety First!). Happy birthday, baby Jesus.