August 28, 2007
Holy Buttfuck, Batman!
I came home to a miasma of fetid air, call it a non-stirring 88 degrees. The dog was wave surfing in her crate in three inches of self-generated saliva. Opened the back door, and, yes! The compressor was running like a ferret with turpentine on its ass. But no coldness. Fuck!
Nothing worse than an August night in Florida with no AC. Whew. And I'm a Free Sweater. Some people are hemophiliacs. Free Bleeders. I'm a Free Sweater.
IF it's 86 in the rest of the house it's 96 in my bedroom, because the setting sun burns through the sliding door, through the vertical blinds.
Christ! Did I mention how hot it is in here?
I feel like a buried miner. I don't have a canary. I don't even have a sentinel chicken. But I feel faint...
Whoopsie! I have cable! Oh. History Channel. Buried miners.
Have I told you how hot it is in here?
Pool!
This is sweet. Contraband Cuban Monte Cristo Cigar, playing gator in the pool. Nothing visible but the eyes. Can't sleep here, though. Might drownd myself. Sheets already wet. Am I live blogging?
UPDATE 10:38: Still hot as Hell. Although the sweat has plastered my hair back in a rather sexy continental look. Hope there ain't no dancin' goin' on!
This just hasn't been your week, has it?
Posted by: Belinda at August 28, 2007 9:31 PMIn the immortal words of Dick Nixon, Fuck No!
Posted by: Velociman at August 28, 2007 9:42 PMLet's see... it's not crap blogging; it sounds like swamp-blogging.
Posted by: Joan of Argghh! at August 28, 2007 10:08 PMAlthough, I'm not sure I can get another Instalanche out of swamp-blogging.
:o)
Posted by: Joan of ARgghh! at August 28, 2007 10:09 PMJeezus, I hate it when the A/C goes kerflooie.
Condenser fan seized up on us a couple months ago. Luckily, the downstairs stayed cool...but it was hot slogging up in topgallant country.
And two years ago we came home from a week in Destin to a 90 degree house. Aircon done died thanks to a Freon leak.
That's what you call a real Fuckeroo.
Stay cool, brah.
Posted by: Elisson at August 28, 2007 10:54 PMFans... lots of fans! and cold drinks.
Posted by: Jean at August 29, 2007 12:09 AMMy A/C broke last week. There's nothing like coming home after a shitty day at work and walking into 90+ temperatures inside your home. Fortunately I just called the office and they sent someone to fix it...that's the nice part about renting.
Posted by: zonker at August 29, 2007 8:04 AMJust bought a new HVAC unit for the Katfarm last week. Not as much fun as buying a new sports car.
Posted by: rankin' rob at August 29, 2007 9:19 AMIf it's any consolation, being a "free sweater" is better than being a really expensive cashmere cardigan... especially in this weather.
Posted by: Dash at August 29, 2007 10:32 AMSend some of that heat up here... it was 41 degrees this morning.
Posted by: Alaska Kim at August 29, 2007 12:25 PMAlaska Kim needs to send some of that cool our way.
Posted by: nickel1942 at August 29, 2007 4:19 PMBe happy to. Use to live in Panama City, FL when I was a little brat..... now you couldn't pay me to even visit there in the summertime.
Posted by: Alaska Kim at August 29, 2007 4:46 PMWe used to fill Gatorade bottles with water and freeze them for our pet rabbit to snuggle up against when it was hot. Maybe the same thing would work for people?
Posted by: Peggy U at August 29, 2007 7:03 PMThat free sweating is a Brannon thang. Trading withe the eneny is not so cool. The stoggie thang and all.
Posted by: Don Jr. at August 30, 2007 8:59 PM