Velociworld: I WAS GONNA THROW A BASH

June 30, 2006

I WAS GONNA THROW A BASH

The Senator, me old father, used to use that expression when he was pissed at us kids, even unto our twenties or thirties. It meant, loosely, that he was angered that we'd perhaps shown a bit less deference than he required at the moment, and he was punishing us by denying us a rather specious, fictitious party he supposedly had in the offing. At times, in our teens, he would aver that he had been going to buy us fancy sports cars, too, but for the fact we had just recently disillusioned him.

We knew, and he knew, and we knew that he knew, that no such bash was ever contemplated, but it was a convenient fiction for him, and we acquisesced to that fiction. Because. Why? Because the next time he might actually be tight enough to score that TR-6.

What sucks? Well, I suck. But the fact that my posts will never again be scrutinized, parsed, vilified by Acidman sucks worse. I always wrote with a bit of the old What Would Acidman Think? Like pleasing your big brother. Rob was always very generous with an e-mail about that was a good post, that one sucked. Usually, ha ha, it was I wish I could write like you VMan! And I would say I wish I could get a posse of insane women drooling over my every written word, dog. I'm jealous.

That I will miss. Now I'm spluttering into an echo chamber. No check, no balance. No late night e-mail from Rob that was headered "You Have To Be Fucking Kidding Me..."

But that's how friends are. Their own worst critics. Wait until I discuss the memorial service. Psycho ain't in it, as they say.

Posted by Velociman at June 30, 2006 10:43 PM

Comments

He's still there. You just have to listen harder to get the message.

Posted by: og at July 1, 2006 1:09 AM

We're counting on you to get us through this Vman. I'll be happy to send you an ocassional late email that says something like "are you shittin me" if that helps. Or would you prefer I lurk in the background and drool?

Posted by: Libby at July 1, 2006 1:20 AM

I am very glad you got to come to Rob's funeral, he loved you like a little brother and always talked about you and our parties, thanks again for making the trip, Cat

Posted by: Catfish at July 1, 2006 2:09 AM

It was good to meet you. I'm sorry it couldn't have been under different circumstances. My daughter was highly impressed by you when she made that delivery stop in Jacksonville.

Posted by: Willy at July 1, 2006 3:39 AM

What Libby said, squared.

Posted by: Marianne at July 1, 2006 4:23 AM

If it helps, we'll all continue to criticize, scrutinize and send you an ocassional "fucktard" email. I'm always in to help 'the cause'...

Posted by: Lisa W. at July 1, 2006 9:38 AM

Oh and if you want us all to start drooling, ditch those sidebar pictures and show us some skin...;)

Posted by: Lisa W. at July 1, 2006 9:39 AM

Psycho is the new black, Chief.

Posted by: Chablis at July 1, 2006 9:47 AM

I'll tell ya what bro. I'll send you emails asking wtf you are yapping about if you promise to explain it to me. In terms I can actually understand ok?

And if it helps, I've always drooled over you too. ;)

Posted by: livey at July 1, 2006 10:33 AM

Don't forget Libby, we'll need to email him photos of our red toe nails too......
Or do you prefer a different color Vman?

Posted by: Maeve at July 1, 2006 10:46 AM

Red is fine, Maeve. Matches my neck, as it were.

Posted by: Velociman at July 1, 2006 11:57 AM

If somebody had told me three years ago I would start painting my toenails red to please a man I've never met, I wouldn't have believed them. But I do so love traditions. It will be nice to keep this one up....

Posted by: Libby at July 1, 2006 1:41 PM

You can't keep the red sluts down, even I send a photo to Dana's
http://frankensoul.typepad.com/
Project Red Toes

Posted by: KeesKennis at July 1, 2006 3:29 PM

I know it won't be the same, but I would be happy to, on occasion, send you a message reminding you that, "You suck...go fuck yerself with that Brokeback shit!"

But I draw the line at painting my toenails and drooling.

Posted by: David K. at July 1, 2006 5:23 PM

Eh, you tell us what comes out of your ass, and the women will drool and the men will tell you that you really are a fucktard. Don't forget the occasional booger is icing on the cake ;)

Posted by: Beatle412 at July 1, 2006 6:30 PM

Don't worry Kim, I'll tell you that you suck any time you want me too, even if you don't.

Posted by: Denny at July 1, 2006 10:26 PM

Yeah, but Kees. Are they YOUR toes painted red? Or did you send that picture of the elepahnt toes? I did my part and sent a photo to Dana.

Posted by: Maeve at July 1, 2006 11:19 PM

Red toes for Vman? Naw, Vman gets off on deformities. Extra thumbs, third nipples, bulging hernias, missing belly buttons. Those are the pics that'll float his boat. Vman be freakie-deekie.

Posted by: Key at July 2, 2006 4:41 PM

I may not be a pack, but I do qualify as an insane woman, and I do drool over your words. Countless keyboards lost in your honor.

Posted by: Cythen at July 2, 2006 4:43 PM

I believe Key has me smoked out. Yar, I'm a triple nipple freak.

Posted by: Velociman at July 2, 2006 6:19 PM

I'll tell ya what bro. I'll send you emails asking wtf you are yapping about if you promise to explain it to me. In terms I can actually understand ok?

And if it helps, I've always drooled over you too. ;)
Posted by livey at July 1, 2006 10:33 AM

FFS, talk about clueless....
No, Lil Toni (in case you come here, too), I don't think she's gonna take ANY hints.

Not from Rob, Dave, V-man, me, you, God...

Toys in the attic, man.
Toys in the attic.

(And, if the truth is an "attack", you have a guilty conscience...)

P.S. What words would those be, by the way?
"Hooked on Phonics for Dummies"?

(Sorry V-man... rough day. Tongue's sore from biting it so much lately. Gotta come out somewhere...)

Posted by: Stevie at July 2, 2006 7:13 PM

So how do we grow third nipples and extra toes and shit? Is there a special fertilizer for that? Hormone pills?

Posted by: Libby at July 3, 2006 12:12 PM

http://1502.sla903sa.info
http://1503.sla903sa.info
http://1504.sla903sa.info
http://1505.sla903sa.info
http://1506.sla903sa.info
http://1507.sla903sa.info
http://1508.sla903sa.info
http://1509.sla903sa.info
http://1510.sla903sa.info