Velociworld

SPECIOUS SPECIES SPECULATION

A turtle has flippers. A tortoise has feet. Now there's a hell of a species differentiation test. And I for one would like any prospective amour to be able to pass that test. Hands, or feet, down. Iffen I slip off a pump I want to see digits. But then, I am a bit of an elitist.

A close friend once dated a girl with webbed feet. Would that make her a tortle? Or just a common garden variety slut? I don't know the answer to that. I do know I would never have sexual relations with her in the surf. If you pissed her off she would be in her element, and have the upper hand. Another friend of mine once had his Labrador Blackberry drowded in the Moon River by an otter. Imagine that. A strapping assed dog drownded by an otter. I think it would be much of the same thing with the web-footed girl. She could get the weather-gauge on you, and drownd you. No sir. I should not partake of that particular slice of plum pudding. I don't like the odds.