May 9, 2006
FISH IN A BARREL
Commenter Quilly Mammoth left the following comment on my previous post In Re the Ryobi:
Lessee...you bought a discount motor operated piece of hardware at a low dollar, high volume Big Box that has bankrupted thousands of small hardware stores where you used to get real advice and now you're pissed. Is that what I'm reading here?Ryobi, Honda, Husquevarna and Echo are all good brands provided you go to a place that sells the real equipment to the wetbacks that now mow most of America. That shit lasts forever and isn't all that expensive. With what Jose' and Roberto get paid they aren't going to spend much more than you did but need something that will cut ten or fifeteen yards a day. For years.
That's what you get for being cheap. Go to a real yard equipment store and get someone...they are usually called a salesperson...to show you some **String Trimmers** and demo them for you. You'll probably pay $50.00 to $75.00 more than at Lowes or HD but think of the great rant you'll get from dealing with them.
Good God. Where to begin? I usually let these comments speak for themselves, but every now and then someone attempts to actually draw a bit of blood, and I must take umbrage. Shall the deconstruction begin?
Well, I have to give you the fact that is what you're reading here, although that is only because you are a fucking moron, incapable of discerning basic facts. It was NOT a discount item, it was a decent mid-level product. I'll give you it was a high volume, low dollar Big Box, and that is precisely why I shop there. So that I have more dollars in my pocket than you at the end of the day.
Has Home Depot bankrupted thousands of mom and pop hardware stores? I fucking hope so! I'm also very glad Henry Ford drove the buggy whip manufacturers out of business. People too fucking stupid to sniff the breeze, see which way the economic wind blow, deserve to be drove out of business. I want to see Darwin's little feet growing out of their backs, too.
You mention advice, Quilly. Nice to have, but if I need advice on how to wield a motherfucking weedwhacker I need advice on how to tie my shoes, and reminders not to bite the other kids on the short bus. I also need Thorazine. Which, I'll tell you, could probably work wonders in your particular instance.
Then you contradicted yourself and admitted the product I bought was really no more expensive than what the professional lawn care providers pay for. I will graciously allow you your contradiction, because it is further proof of your buffoonery.
You also call me cheap. Which, again, is contradicted by the fact I am willing to buy high end products, and I listed them, but you seem drawn to the fact that I bought from a national retail chain, which leads me to surmise your parents, or perhaps your grampies, had a small little hardware store that got drivved out of bizness by Homeland Security Depot. Or Loweblow. My personal feelings? I don't fucking care! I just care you sucked a tiny fraction of my bandwidth, cocksucker.
Oh, and actually, going to a "real yard equipment store"? I go to them all the time. They are bepestered by brain damaged pudknockers, who have nothing better to do of a Saturday than hang around the counter and talk stringer smack with the Godsmote retard with the cast in his eye who is supposed to be manning the counter. They are RETARDS, Dude! They fucking drool. And they have 210% markups on their products. That may be your mom, and your pop, but they sure as fucking hell aren't mine.
No, thanks. I'll buy the cheapest product within reason that gets the job done. Or pay the greaseballs.
And you, of course, may pull up my site from the counter of the Tards, and besclaim "I tole him what fer! Bert his whacker at Lowe! Barstid!"
You, sir, may have that moment.
Memo to Self: Play nice with V-Man.
Posted by: Jim - PRS at May 9, 2006 11:36 PMTHAT's gonna leave a mark...
Posted by: Bane at May 9, 2006 11:37 PMI was trying to think of an appropriate comment when I saw Bane's. That pretty much covers it for me.
Paul
Posted by: Light & Dark at May 10, 2006 2:54 AM"Has Home Depot bankrupted thousands of mom and pop hardware stores? I fucking hope so! I'm also very glad Henry Ford drove the buggy whip manufacturers out of business. People too fucking stupid to sniff the breeze, see which way the economic wind blow, deserve to be drove out of business. I want to see Darwin's little feet growing out of their backs, too."
I drink to dat,
Love It, Or GTFO!
DAMN, not even a reach around...
Posted by: james old guy at May 10, 2006 6:50 AMSkidmark, Bane. Skidmark.
Normally I'd prescribe a steak and a blowjob for such irascible behavior, but seeing as how each post is a lesson in verbal ass-rippage, I'll refrain.
And uh, sorry if I've pissed you off?
Posted by: Cythen at May 10, 2006 7:19 AMSo, Echo is okay to buy, then?
Posted by: jdallen at May 10, 2006 8:57 AMHe's baaaaack...
Posted by: Elisson at May 10, 2006 10:26 AMThe worst thing he ever called me is a "pathetic fucker".
I guess I should call myself lucky after this.
Posted by: steelheader at May 10, 2006 11:45 AM"brain damaged pudknocker"...
Holy crap -- that was funny!!
Posted by: Alaska Kim at May 10, 2006 11:59 AMOh, Christ, to be able to retort like that...I'd pay millions.
Posted by: Skwerly at May 10, 2006 1:24 PMJust Barking Mad after reading that : )
Posted by: JohnB at May 10, 2006 4:09 PMI'm actually pleased about this...it must mean that V-man likes me. I mean, I've called him a fucktard in the comments before, but he's never dedicated a whole post to me as blowback.
Guess I'm doing okay after all. Either that or he just ignores me.
Posted by: David K. at May 10, 2006 5:22 PMJust so the Mammoths of the world know: Before Wal-Mart was the biggest retailer in the nation, that honor belonged to Sears. Before Sears, it was Montgomery Ward. Some day, most likely in our lifetime, somebody (Red Star-Mart?) will overtake Wal-Mart. That is Greenspan's theory of evolution.
Mom and Pop stores have such higher mark ups because they have to pay the lawyers to keep Pop out of prison for diddling Little Mom.
Marvelous, V-Man. Just marvelous. Haven't heard or seen a rant that good since the local Committee asked my Dad to run for Congress in 1956. What you ought to do, when you get your doc properly arranged, is get him to treat this state as optimum and prescribe meds to maintain it continuously.
Of course, it's as full of shit as the local Water Quality Assurance Facility, but a classic even so.
My neighbor has two string trimmers. They are outwardly identical, have the same engine displacement, same control arrangement, etc. Their nameplate model numbers differ by one digit. These are high-end trimmers, with straight shafts and geared heads. One of them was purchased at a Big Box (name not given here). The other cost, IIRC, $79 more at the local lawnmower shop, and is a year older than the one bought at Big Box.
The "Big Box" trimmer has plastic gears -- I know; he's getting on in years, and I've replaced them for him twice. The "local merchant" trimmer has metal gears, and I've only had it open once, to see if the metal ones will fit in the other trimmer. No dice.
The rest of the Big Box trimmer is much the same. If there was a corner to be cut in manufacture they not only cut it, they moved the curb back and cut that. The trimmer he got from the local guy has some overclever engineering, but it starts, runs, keeps the string on, and doesn't break. The one from Big Box is just before going to IESI to help raise New Orleans.
I've had the same experience personally with window air conditioners.
The Big Box stores have so much buying clout that they extort lower supplier prices successfully. The suppliers make the price lower by lowering their costs, using not only plastic but cheap plastic for critical parts and flat leaving stuff out. (The Ryobi my local hardware sells still has the auto-winding head, for instance.) The brands go along because it's the only game in town, but if you think you're getting the same machine at Wal*Mart or Home Depot that you buy from a local retailer -- well, you know all those wonderful dividends you've been getting? It's called "from one pocket to the other". You buy crap, the company takes the money to the bank, and twice a year they return you a nickel on the dollar.
Enjoy. I know Quilly; he's not stupid. Keep track of what you pay for trimmers. At the end of five years I'm betting you'll have paid out between twice and three times what he did, done half the yard work, and spent four times as long either fixing them yourself or getting warranty repairs. The good part is that when one of them fails we'll get a really great rant to read. Better than dividends, really.
Regards,
Ric
.. ran out of vodka again, didn't you..
Posted by: Eric at May 11, 2006 2:57 AMHot damn! A string trimmer debate!
Anyone worth their lawn maintenance salt knows that Ryobi is fucking junk with a capital J. It's as simple as that.
Ryobi makes printing equipment and animes. You can't make printing equipment AND quality lawn impliments? That shit is in the Bible, bro.
Do what I do: a pump sprayer and diesel fuel. After 24 hours, I got edging 28 inches wide. It's brown, dead, and stinks like a truck stop, but I didn't have to bend over to get it.
Posted by: bitterman at May 11, 2006 10:36 AMHah! I love it when you get all riled up. This is the best post I've read in months. I think Acidman is rubbing off on you.
Posted by: assrot at May 11, 2006 8:46 PMWow! Weedwhacker flame wars! Who woulda guessed?
The good news is that if the gummint ever really deports all the wetbacks back to Mexico, there's gonna be one hellova used weedwhacker market on eBay!
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