Velociworld

BADGER BAG

I can tell when the seasons change, because Anna posts. Although I'm pretty sure that's last year's Passion of the Bunny pic. But I left a cryptic reference to Badger Bag in her comments, then realized no one knows who the fuck that is. Ofttimes what I consider tantalizingly obscure most people consider offendingly obtuse.

And so, as expiation, 'cause 'tis the season (and I find proffering a chunk o' my soul infinitely less distressing than a chunk o' my bonus, me not being much of an XMas guy, or a giver, by nature), I will explain:

When nautical types cross the Equator there is a bit of hazing for the First Timers. I believe this tradition started in the Royal Navy, so of course Rum, Sodomy, and the Lash were likely involved. And yet the tradition has continued. Pubic shaving, paddling, there ain't no fucking rum on board anymore, but the rest has obviously obtained.

I wander. Anyway, there is a several hundreds year olde tradition that when the Equator is crossed someone dressed as King Neptune appears on the deck, generally accompanied by his helper, Badger Bag. Whether King Neptune is the entity applying the scourge is lost to me, however I am sure it was a most solemn role. I have no idea what Badger Bag looked like, or looks like (I'll bet there was plenty of sodomy and the lash just the windward side of the Falklands, for instance). But if I were captain of a squared rigged vessel, and crossed the Line, I would want my Badger Bag to look like this:



Nota bene: I have never crossed the Equator. I have crossed the North Atlantic in a square rigger, but no Badger Bag for me. I still fart in high sweet tones, rather like an oboe. Beware he of the bassoon tone. There is evil at work there. And I'm not charging for that bit of info, by the way.