Velociworld

I don't know if anything scares me, precisely, but these are the things that have haunted me most through the years.

Age 10-Realizing that my dad was bringing women home when my mother was out of town.

Age 21- Father-figure dying when the blood vessels in his throat collapsed from years of dry heaves and puking as a result of alcohol abuse.

Age 23- Saying goodbye to my son (and every Father's Day since).

Age 28- Divorce.

Age 35- Realizing that my father had intentionally failed to execute my grandfather's will--and feeling completely powerless to do anything about it.

Damn, Zombyboy. I was just speaking in the generis, you know? Actually, you are dead on. I'll share shortly. Pretty similar.

First Endoscopy.....rotorootin', damn, I'm sweatin' already.

Every April... hell, every quarter... The Revenuers.

The Taxman Cometh, and he scares the shit out of me.

Havin' every in-law you have live with you for a long period of time, except for two of 'em. They had better gigs.

Wife gettin' a "career" that isn't really, but is thought to be by those in the relationship in the "know".

Losin' what you could've had, 'cause of one, and two above.

Monsters? Fuck 'em. Bring 'em on. I can kill monsters dead. I've got Predator vs Alien memorised. Watched it 13 times last weekend.

It's the actual "problems" that scare the livin' shit out of me.

Writing a coherent fucking sentence. How's the book coming along anyway?

Do I sense a *meme*???!

Wondering if I'm safe while I sleep. After all these years, still waking up at the slightest sound, in a cold sweat, hoping not to see a silhouette in the doorway.

Prison and the deep fear of inter-racial sodomy. Only thing that kept me out of jail, well for more than an afternoon at least.

The government, especially with the advent of surveillance technology.
They can accuse you of something, put you on trial, tender some doctored evidence of you dealing in narcotics or meeting with Islamo-fascists, and throw in some extraneous manufactured evidence of you leering at a child or not able to get it up in an intimate moment, just for the sake of a little shame and humiliation.

Old ladies who want to discuss your food choices at the supermarket checkout.
Should be legal to shoot 'em.

My monster is death.

The first woman I truly fell in love with. To paraphrase Stephen King "it will be love you judge all others by and find them wanting". A monster that I still live with.

Like I always say, I am afraid of everything, and nothing.

I'm afraid my parents won't die, and afraid they will.

Most of my monsters are dead, and stuffed, with glittering glass eyes to replace the raging red ones that used to be in their heads.

The ones, still alive, prowl, out there in the dark, just out of range. I leave bait out. I will slaughter those cocksuckers one by one.

To conquer the beast, I am afraid I may have become one.

I love my monsters. Sunday, the 13th, I went elk hunting. At seven in the mourning I got a speeding ticket, doing 69 in a 55 mph speed zone. Not a good start. At eight I got my pickup stuck in the snow. After 8 1/2 hours of trying to free it, in the middle of a mixed snow and rain storm I gave up. It was getting dark. I took off my sopping wet clothes and sat in the truck with the heater on to dry off. I had a couple sips of bourbon, read part of a book, and listened to the radio in between planning my efforts to free my truck in the morning. I finally crawled into my sleeping bag and waited for daylight. Well, it all turned out OK or I wouldn't be writing this. Other than a little frostbite on my fingers and a swollen left hand I came out pretty well. My point being, that it is the monsters in life that make you really appreciate life. If every thing works smoothly in your life day in and day out, well good for you, but for me I like a little edge in life once in a while.

Dying before my kids are grown.

Being unable to protect my family.

Not being able to provide for my family.

Losing my kids...

(And airplanes. Those sumbitches scare the SHIT out of me, even before 9/11...)

I have to agree with Dishonorable Schoolboy. That first love ruins some men for all other women. I have felt the monster's presence for many, many moons but could not identify what was ruining subsequent relationships. Finally I was able to throw a light on that sumbitch and at least take stock of the task of reducing its size. Lop a limb off here and there. But it will never be fully slain.

To quote Slowhand:

And it makes me so angry
To know that the flame still burns
Why can't I get over?
When will I ever learn?

Old love, leave me alone
Old love, go on home

You guys are a collection of seriously crusty old sumbitchers. I'm humbled by reading the comments, let alone the velocitous post.

As for monsters, there is some damn boy out there who will date my daughter in a few years, but I think he's only my monster, not hers.