October 15, 2005
DER DEADLY DISTLEFINK
I scored a distlefink once upon a time. An Amish thing. Good luck upon one's house, and all. Blessed my mother with one, too. And my mother-in-law. I bought the shit out of distlefinks after a trip to Gettysburg one weekend, and a drive through Lancaster County, PA.
I'm pretty sure they are actually bad news. No good shit arose from those distlefinks. Just bad news. Fuck those Amish. I think they sold me bad, bad, ju ju.
The Daddy Hex works for me...bwahahahah!!!
Posted by: Yabu at October 16, 2005 1:59 AMFucking Amish, I was in one of their little stores north of Lancaster with a German friend of mine. As a pair of yuppies left the store the bonnet heads began to chatter in their amish-speak, talking about how much they hate tourists, etc. The only probelm is amishese is a dialect of German. My friend began picking up every item he could carrry. He had hundreds of dollars of merchandise and he told me to grab a bunch of stuff too. We placed it on the counter and waited while the stuff was rung up. The total was nearly $400. When the bonnet-head smiled sweetly and told him the total, my friend looked a ther and told her in German that maybe she should be careful about what she says about tourists and told her to never mind. We walked out laughing our asses off.
Posted by: hoosierboy at October 16, 2005 10:05 AMDistlefink antidote: 12 gauge.
Posted by: Pedro the Ignorant at October 16, 2005 10:42 AMYou should've sprang for the "Double Distlefink" if you needed that much good ju ju.
When you get done fuckin' 'round with all that Amish symbology, just get a damned horse shoe and hang it upside down over your door. It's guaranteed to have the same effect, if not better. At least it's worth it's weight in iron.
PS: Thanks for the new word... Distlefink. I never, ever, would've thought that to be a real word. Now, I'm gonna go whip somebody's ass in Scrabble.
Posted by: RedNeck at October 16, 2005 7:10 PMI'm going to create an Amish porn channel where the women take off their bonnets.
Posted by: Anna at October 18, 2005 1:05 AMOK, what's this...?
Clip clop bang clip clop bang clip clop bang
It's an Amish drive-by.
Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week.
Veloci-Dude...
My hand to God, there is an custard stand/burger joint less than two miles from my (new) home called Distlefink's.
I thought it was a last name.
Now I've gotta go click yer link to see what they really are....
And, if ya ever get to G'burg again, you KNOW you're staying here, right?
(I am less than 4 miles north of G'burg, after all... three bedroom farmhouse on a dairy farm... satellite TV and, for "special" guests such as yourself, God's own way of saying "relax", IF ya catch my drift (of smoke). You bring the booze ya like, I've got the "other" covered... *grin*)
Cool.
Posted by: Stevie at October 19, 2005 3:01 AMThank you, thank you. I'll be here all week.
Still in Vegas? :)
Posted by: Desert Cat at October 20, 2005 2:26 AM