Velociworld

I ain't got your punch bowl, but I can tell you how to keep the "sticky" away. It's easy really. You just spray everything down with WD-40 'fore you get the sticky stuff out. That liquid teflon is some cool shit now. Then, after the punch kicks in a bit, spray the floor 'round the "servin'" area. Laughter at other's pain as the try to figure out who kicked 'em will ensue.

If no one has a punch bowl, try looking at a few thrift stores or junky antique stores. I've been in the antique biz for many years....and trust me, you can't even give those things away in a free pile! If you find one, I'm sure the seller will be more than greatful to have you take it off their hands!

And hey, is there an official recipe for the Artillery Punch...or is that a trade secret???

Come to think of it, you look and act JUST LIKE Jim Williams. Kinda sorry you pointed it out. You can pick up a punchbowl at a Wal Mart along the way, unless you insist on crystal, then you really would be on the Williams tip...

I believe you well-meaning folks miss the point, to wit: sure I can pick up a $5 punch bowl. I just like the sense of power it gives me when someone else does it for me.

Here's the best information I can give you on Chatham Artillery Punch
The following punch recipe was provided by Elizabeth Edgerton (elizaann@premier1.net) from a clipping she possesses from the New York Herald Tribune, circa 1930s.

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Preceeding the recipe is this short explanation:

"The recipe, which was kept jealously secret for years and was unobtainable by an outsider, is presented here together with the historical date submitted by our Virginia Trailer.

"Originated with the Chatham Artillery, Savannah, Ga., and served in that city for more than 100 years. It is delicious, seductive, powerful. This is the punch that knocked out Admiral Schley when he visited Savannah in 1899 after the Spanish War. Admiral Cervera's Spanish shells were harmless to the brave American admiral, but Artillery Punch scored a direct hit which put him out for two days.

For 100 People (Or Ten Admirals)

1-1/2 gallons Catawba Wine
1-1/2 quarts Rye Whisky
1/2 gallon St. Croix Rum
1/2 pint Benedictine
1 quart Gin
1 quart Brandy
1-1/2 gallons strong tea
2-1/2 pounds brown sugar
Juice 1-1/2 dozen oranges
Juice 1-1/2 dozen lemons

I know it tastes so damned good that you won't even know you're getting drunk. I've spent many St.Patrick's Days sipping on Chatham Artillery Punch. One year I had to sleep my buzz off in one of Savannah's finest parking garages. Also, if you want to make it for a smaller number of people, just divide to decrease the recipe.

Believe it or not, I do not own a punchbowl. My mama does, though. I'll give her a holler and ask if I can borrow it; if it's not in use at a Red Hat function, she might let us make use of it.

I'm not a drinker, what's Benedictine? It sounds medicinal.

I've got two punch bowls and a 10 gallon liquid beverage container thingy.

Unfortunately I'm not going :( and if I mailed it to ya it wouldn't arrive on time.

Whoops. Just saw that "shattered in the parking lot" bit. Uh-uh. I ain't bringing that punchbowl, you Mutant. Forget I mentioned it!

We need a punchbowl of ineffable valuelessness. In other words, something Zonker can wear on his head between batches, and we won't care when he falls down and breaks it. DO NOT bring yo mama's fine stuff.

BTW Livey, Benedictine is exquisite brandy, made by the monks of the same name, no doubt to date-rape drug their alterboys. It is exquisite, nonetheless.

Benedictine, indeed, is God's Perfect Liquor. Oh, were I not poor. When rich, I used to mix it with VSOP brandy, and swill it from a snifter.

V-Man, I see no reason you cannot pay someone to transfer your poisonous sludge into a keg, and deliver it thusly. No muss, no fuss. Failing that, buy a quantity of quart size containers, and fill them with a gas funnel. Quick and dirty, put them in ice chests, ice them down, and voila, excuse my French.

I have a solution to your troubles. When you drive up, stop off in Tifton and go to Agri-Supply Company (don't remember the exit, but it's within a mile of I-75). Buy a 25 gallon watering trough and a big-ass funnel, such as the ones we use to fuel tractors and other assorted machinery.

The watering trough gives you the biggest punchbowl in the state. The funnel will make it easier to do your mixing as you pour it from one container to another.

You can either go with plastic or galvinized... but people may think you're putting on airs if you go with galvinzed.

Now, if you'd said Jim Jones...

Oh, and as for the punchbowl, I believe that Big Lots sells plastic sets rather inexpensively. Or, you could simply use a long-handled ladle and attach something to the end from which it could be suspended over the top edge of the bucket.

Or, you could buy a couple of those 'sun tea' containers, I believe they have spouts on them.

Or, you could just use one of those big Igloo water coolers with the spout at the bottom.

As for transferring from one container to the next...I thought you southern boys were acquainted with the term siphon.

We Southern Boys ARE acquainted with the term siphon, flynny. How do you think I kept my car gassed up in high school? Only we called them Arkansas credit cards.

A buddy of mine had an electric pump set up in his trunk, hooked to yardage of 1" surgical tubing, and tied directly into his gas tank.

He would pull into the parking lot of a bar, where everybody was distracted by the fun inside, and go from car to truck to car, just taking sips off the top, like a considerate vampire.

That fucker never got caught, and never bought gas as long as I knew him. The setup was quiet, just a hum, and he had it fixed so he could reach up in the wheel-well and grab the hose, run it over, and suck away.

16 comments so far and only two specifically related to bringing a punchbowl. I take it "Intrepids" isn't Latin for "focused", Vman?

I'll pick up a punchbowl at target or walmart or something this week. Just remind me before I head up! I'm not too focused myself.

With all of the CAP floating around, almost seems like a waste to bring the fixin's for Sazeracs...but I may do it anyway in honor of N'Awlins. Anybody? Anybody?

Jim Jones! Good one, Flynny.

I am so damn jealous. You people get the non-pulp version.

.. I liked the pulp... when we started drinking it at 9:30 in the morning, it made up for skipping breakfast...

.. oh, and I like DaveH's idea... nothing like drinking from a trough to set the scene..

Thanks Eric! I think it would be fitting for this crowd...

I would be happy to loan one of mine, but they're all 50 gallon or larger.

If it is better than your last batch, Denny and me would eat the puchbowl afterwards, Cat

Beth's recipe was fine, except for leaving out the case of Champagne to be added right before serving.

Just Damn! (©2005 Dax Montana Enterprises, all rights reserved)

I did not try the punch at Jekyll, I will not try the punch at Helen. I value my life. My husband tried some and has lost all visible sign of brain activity. Of course, that may not be a bad thing.

Y'all need one of these:
http://cgi.ebay.com/Nalgene-Rectangular-Carboy-with-Spigot_W0QQitemZ7548368550QQcategoryZ26237QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

Why does the phrase "turd in the punchbowl" come to mind?

Damn, I wish I could be there.

I make it a rule to never drink anything that will keep me from achieving and maintaining an erection.

If you can get a boner, you are safe to drive.

Words to live by.

Unless yer under the age of 25.

I do believe but am not swearing to the fact that I have a punch bowl and glasses to match. If I find them I will bring them. What southern lady wouldn't of had them in the time of tupperware parties. Rick says that only glass will do I'm sure mine is glass if it's still hiding under my bed.

Ellison --

We're already scaring the bejeesus out of Buckaroo Bonsai. Of COURSE you should bring the fixings for Sazeracs...

Leslie

V-Man - The containers you used at Jekyll were just fine. They added to the ambiance. Are Ric and Georgia coming? Holy crap! Now I know why you're bringing the bullwhip.

Moogie - You have to try the punch! If I'm playing and singing, the more you drink the better I sound.

Geez, you guys are helpless. Haven't you ever had a party with a lot of punch? You put it in buckets with spigots. Also, buy a lid and you can transport this pup anywhere without spilling.

http://www.morebeer.com/product.html?product_id=16591