June 17, 2005
KEELHAULING
One did not survive a keelhauling, right? Being dragged repeatedly across the barnacle-encrusted hull of a ship with ropes tied to wrists and ankles? Death sentence, I would think. Hell, I'd be gulping water trying to drownd myself. I wonder who came up with that idea?
At any rate, I was thinking of keelhauling my neighbor, using my other neighbor's little paddleboat. He'd survive that, I'm sure. But he might think twicet about emptying the trash from his vehicle in my fucking yard again.
UPDATE: Arrrr!!!
It doesn't have any barnacles, but I could probably drive a few nails through the hull. Leaks like a sieve anyway (note drooping bow).
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