February 7, 2005
A Matter of Priorities
I busted my ass like a sharecropper on the Velocihovel the first five years I lived here, but I haven't done dick for the last two years. The exterior needs a paint job, but I've always owned brick and this looks like a serious pain in the ass to me. Plus I have a couple of dryrot issues I have to fix first. I was going to fix those last summer, but it was hot.
I have old fencing stacked up along my fence in back that has been there for two years, but every time I called the county to see what day they picked up shit like that they never answered, so I quit calling. I used to have a yard like a putting green, now I have the kid next door mow it. He does a shitty job, but it's passable. I pay one service to treat my yard every other month to keep it on life support, and another to keep the Sentricon monitored to keep the fucking ubiquitous termites from ravaging the place.
I need to pressure wash the eaves and pool deck, but I put my pressure washer in my neighbor's garage lest I be tempted to use it. The pool cleaner only works half the time because I never clean it out, therefore I have something or other swirling around the bottom constantly.
The Bride wants granite countertops, new hardwood, and for me to lay the fucking tile I've had for a year in the kitchen. I don't know what the half-life on ceramic tile is, but I'll wager that stuff is dust before I lay the first tile. She wants a new kitchen table, a new entertainment center, new dining room furniture. I haven't sat at a table to eat in a year.
Better to flip this place and buy a condo at the beach. I'd rather stare at the ocean than that pond in the backyard, although the birds are better here. I spend 90% of my time in the Batcave or sleeping, anyway. Now she's yammering to fix up the Cave, just when I have it in a very comfortable state of decay, and disarray.
I'm not lazy. I just finally have my priorities set straight.
You needs to get you some minions. You know, Mini-vmen to do your evil bidding, like kidnapping female agents, stealing nuclear secrets from the Chinese, and cleaning the pool. "And put in some sharks with some fricking lasers!"
Posted by: og at February 7, 2005 9:47 PMAt least you can bask in the comfort of knowing that when you finally do lay the tile, it won't help the resale value of your house because it will be hopelessly out of date by then. Somewhat, like I found to my horror last year, when I got around to installing the avocado shag carpet in the rec room...
Posted by: Circa Bellum at February 7, 2005 10:06 PMsomehow i think this post and the previous post are related...in a half cousin sorta way...
Posted by: mr. helpful at February 7, 2005 10:22 PMAs soon as you named it the Velocihovel, it became a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Now that you've written about it, you can't possibly effect any of those changes, because future tourists will want to see the place exactly as it was when the V-man was there.
Granite was on sale a few years ago when I renovated the Key place, same price as solid it was. So I ran my excited ass over to Home Depot and allowed the sales rep to talk me out of it.
Too much maintenance I was told. Have to wax it all the time.
I hate the word maintenance. I walked. Got the solid, fine for Kitchen. STILL wish I had chosen granite for the wet bar though...
Sorry, I wanted to go for the deeper meaning. I just have a passion for renovating. ; )
Posted by: Key at February 7, 2005 10:42 PM... Jack Straw is right... in future years, when the pilgrims trek to the Velocihovel, the last thing they will want to see is a well-kept pool... Faulknerian decay, brother... that's where your tickets sales will come from...
Posted by: Eric at February 8, 2005 7:16 AMYou and my Big Guy sharing brain waves or something? Or maybe it's those pesky space aliens beaming rays down to you guys.
Geez, the same stuff is going on around here.
I'll wrap some aluminum foil around his head, that ought to stop the invisible rays, doncha think?
Has YOUR wife been talking to MY wife?
Sheesh. We're painting our house now, the carpet is getting pulled up in a month for the sanders and sealers. Seems we have some beautiful honey oak hardwood floors under the disgusting, nasty carpet that came with the house.
Posted by: Darkrose at February 8, 2005 4:56 PMI used to have a pretty nice yard. Then I got the dogs. Yard gone. Tile, did a 3 by 6 bathroom. Tile saws are your friend, tile is not. Bat Cave? Basement bloggin' for me. Nothin' like a hole in a hole now is there.
I say, take a vacation, and teach the Mutant to Velocimpersonate...
basement remodeling idea
Posted by: basement remodeling idea at March 25, 2005 2:10 PMI have just started to look for a new place, and my wife and I are deciding on whether or not to buy new, or old and fix it up.
-Brendan
Posted by: Brendan at July 6, 2006 10:34 PM