January 10, 2005
An Ode to Clavicles
Check this out:
Now, this is a picture of Anna Nicole Smith which I've posted before, but I cropped it a bit to focus on her clavicles. Look at them. Jumping Jeebus. They're like monkey bars!
I must confess the clavicle is the most sensual part of a woman's body to me. They are the yardarms that accentuate the bluff lines of the feminine vessel. The skeletal equivalent of the distaff perfect storm. All comes together at the neckline, anyway, correct? The clavicles are the gateway to the heart, and the mind, at once. Beautiful.
The dimples, the little puddles, that rest atop the collarbones are the reservoir of all that is sexy, graceful, lithe, and lissome in a woman, to me.
Aye, clavs are the best. Some women get disconcerted when they know I'm not making eye contact, but I'm not exactly ogling their breasts, either. What is he looking at?
Now you know. The perfect storm.
UPDATE: To my Intrepids Morons: this is NOT a post about Anna Nicole Smith. This is a post about clavicles. I merely used an available pic to illustrate the concept, as time is money, and three hours would not have found a better example. If you insist on discussing Anna, I suggest you go to Key Issues, who apparently has a fabulous ANS thread going if you have the proper password. She also has a quite fetching picture of clavs on her homepage.
That is all, to paraphrase.
Clavicles my arse! If that were the case, you didn't quite crop enough. Can I help with that photoshop?
Posted by: Christina at January 10, 2005 9:30 PMthey may have been somewhat useful back in the day when that pic was snapped...but nowadays i wouldnt touch em even with your hands....
Posted by: mr. helpful at January 10, 2005 9:39 PMYou are right, Christina. That cleavage was disgusting. I have corrected. As for Mr. Helpful, are you afraid of monkey bars?
Posted by: Velociman at January 10, 2005 9:42 PMBeauty is within my arse.
I can't believe, despite thinking the woman a complete and utter imbecile, I still think that, at least physically, she's beautiful.
You would think that I would no longer see that in her.
Go figure.
And, you're not the first man I've heard mention clavicles... of course, the other man, meant it when he said it.
Posted by: jmflynny at January 10, 2005 9:42 PMGoddam. This is going to be one of those posts. It's a forest, not trees. This is about clavicles, not ANS. I'll be happy to post a pic of the clavs of Grace Jones. They rock, too.
Posted by: Velociman at January 10, 2005 10:00 PMVin Diesel has clavicles and the pecs to go with them...now THAT is what I'd like to see. Please don't crop anything, but the clothes...dear lord, did I actually write all that...
Posted by: Christina at January 10, 2005 10:05 PMI must say, she has the most impressive larnyx I've ever seen. Clavicles - pfftt!
Posted by: Dash at January 10, 2005 10:11 PMI understand about the clavicles, I do. I used to have an ex-boyfriend who sang many a paean to the clavicle; this was the early 90's and we were geeks, so his clav of choice was Lt. Deanna Troi, late of the Starship Enterprise.
I wish I had a killer clav. I have blobs of Scots-Irish tapioca there, instead of actual bone. Anna Nic's look good.
Posted by: Queenie at January 10, 2005 10:18 PMV-man, you frighten me. I like butt-dimples at the top of a woman's ass, but you might like... MY ASS, PERIOD!!!
One more reason for me to stay out of jail.
Posted by: Acidman at January 10, 2005 10:22 PMThat made a lot of sense.
Posted by: Velociman at January 10, 2005 10:35 PMClavicles? Her tits are so big they're pulling all the skin from her entire upper body to a ground zero that soon will be somewhere around upper pelvic.
I don't like bony women. I don't even like bony women with big tits.
This woman is no longer good for sex; her optimal and only use is as a party fetish favor.
v-man...i can appreciate the beauty of a woman's chestiness as well as any man however the current version of anna nicole smith gives new meaning to the term "damaged goods"
Posted by: mr. helpful at January 10, 2005 10:41 PMVman, I think Acidhead is insinuating that because you have an appreciation for something other than t and a, he questions your heteroworthiness.
Personally, I can appreciate diversified lusting.
...only bone I've ever broken btw. They heal funky.
Posted by: Key at January 10, 2005 10:50 PMOf course, she did have a nice series of Christmas Cards this year:
http://www.celluloid-wisdom.com/pw/index.php?/trackback/17408/
Posted by: jmflynny at January 10, 2005 10:51 PMDanit! What is it with my links tonight?
Posted by: jmflynny at January 10, 2005 10:54 PMI'm a gastrocnemius man, myself.
Posted by: Jim - PRS at January 10, 2005 11:09 PMHeh, caught me. I was sneaking over to blackbox the clavs, as suddenly I felt exposed.
Feel. Exposed.
Thanks for the linkage Velocidaddy. ; )
Posted by: Key at January 10, 2005 11:23 PMsorry vman but this IS a post about anna nicole smith and her monkey bars and all your fervent efforts to backtrack will not change that.
it is now on record that you would do anna nicole smith in a heartbeat if only she would show up on your doorstep, nearly comatose in a drunken stupor which is about the only way she travels nowadays....
Posted by: mr. helpful at January 10, 2005 11:26 PMDamn, I feel a little late to the party... I'll be honest, I dottted that, and the clav's, what clav's? I didn't even see 'em. I guess I wasn't lookin' or was distracted. I read this thread of comments while coverin' one eye, but did yall leave out an "e" in there somewhere? I wouldn't call you the "F" word Vman, but you sure are takin' a beatin' about the head for this one ain't ya?
And to think, I almost posted a roscoe surrounded by a devil tatoo tonight. Whew, glad that didn't happen...
Uh... google image search turns up some funky shit somtimes...
Right on, Velociman. To paraphrase the Bard "There are more curves on woman and girl, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy".
I've been a neck lover for longer than I can remember. I think it was Sade that was the turning point for me. Elegant, sensual...mmmmm.
Posted by: Jim at January 11, 2005 8:41 AMi don't see the picture...
Posted by: onebear at May 11, 2005 7:52 PMi don't see any picture.
Posted by: onebear at May 11, 2005 7:53 PMclavicles are the best!!!!!!
-girl
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