October 10, 2004
TIME FOR A FLOGGING
David Caruso. Shit, man, I have skid marks in my boxers with more talent than this putz. They smell better, too. What an overblown piece of shit.
Witness the man's curriculum vitae:
After journeyman work he got his big break on NYPD Blue. Immediately left on a contract dispute (read: shakedown) for his big movie career. Made the bullshit Kiss of Death, then tried a career resurrection with Proof of Life, wherein he tried to out-macho Russell Crowe. Yepper. Currently starring in one of those semen-scraper network shows. A little red-headed prick with about as much game as the 80-pound queer Crip John Leguizamo. Meaning he's played Lucky Pierre before, and will likely do it again. I'll bet he deploys one of those little baby carrots when he's in the clutch. Even Bugs had a real carrot.
Fuck David Caruso.
Skid marks? Damn, I feel sorry for The Bride.
Posted by: Sadie at October 11, 2004 12:34 AMWho?
Posted by: og at October 11, 2004 8:43 AMI saw David Caruso in a restaurant in Dallas lest year, and I kicked him in the nuts for you.
Posted by: jack straw at October 11, 2004 12:08 PMAgreed.
I never understood the hooplah.
Posted by: jmflynny at October 11, 2004 8:32 PMStill remember him being the pussy cop in the first Rambo flick.
Posted by: El Jefe at October 12, 2004 12:08 PMThere is ONE role that is made for David Caruso and that is Head Flying Monkey in the Wizard of Oz. Find a picture of him smiling and tell me he doesn't look like one.
Posted by: Kelly at October 12, 2004 7:29 PMHey did you ever see that B movie where Caruso played the roommate of a human ice cream cone??????
Seriously fucked up shit.
Posted by: Sadie at October 13, 2004 1:52 AMDavid Caruso was terrific as the leader of the Irish street gang in Hill Street Blues. It couldn't have been easy to get your props in the hood dressed like the Lucky Charms leprechaun, but he and the other gang members survived several seasons.
Today, I have never seen an actor play ever single scene like he was fighting the urge to kiss someone. Man, woman, child, dog -- the guy hungers to plant one on them all.
Posted by: Rogers Cadenhead at October 13, 2004 2:36 PMI'm nodding enthusiasically because I've always thought he was a schmuck. I don't think he's cuuute, I don't think he's smouldering, I don't think he's much of an actor as a huge, festering ego with hair.
Posted by: Margi at October 13, 2004 11:12 PMDavid Caruso was also a big Wuss in Officer and a Gentleman and was out quick. Overall Wussy! LOL
Posted by: Mayo at September 12, 2006 8:47 PMYup he sux. But the days during NYPD Blues? Id totally fuckin tapp that. Id tear that apart.
Posted by: Maura at January 17, 2007 2:47 PMCaruso is a walking joke as an actor and a complete douche - on and off camera.
Posted by: Vixen at June 7, 2007 8:27 AM