June 25, 2004
Advice
When I was back there in seminary school (screech). Wait a minute. That was Jim Morrison, trying to crawl his bloated, flyblown corpse back into the real world through my thorax. Hold on while I burn him with this cross. There. Ssssshh, Jim. Ssssshh.
Where was I? Yes. When I was back there at Tulsa School of Welding I saw a guy get that freaky deak thing you get when you watch someone weld for about half an hour without Alamagordo Brand super goggles. That thing where you go blind for about 24 hours, and writhe and squirm on the ground like a salted slug, because the pain is so intense. Lord, how he cried. I believe they were tears. It may have been molten eyeball. This was no cakeboy, either. He'd just been discharged from the Marines, and was a hoss. But he was a dumb hoss. I told that fellow to put on his goggles, but he didn't listen.
Which brings to my point. How many people really take advice? And what is the specific gravity at which unheeded advice goes from an honest desire to help to unmitigated meddling? I'm rather bullheaded, and tend to distrust others, so I usually attempt to determine why that person is offering advice, and what they hope to get out of it. If there is a complementary benefit to me I might take it.
Who do you trust with advice, anyway? I wouldn't take advice from Ghandi, for instance. In fact, I once channelled him, and the only advice he gave me was to drink my own urine, and work the loom. I also eschew advice from those who manage to get themselves capped, so he was a nonstarter.
I seldom took advice from my father, and that's too bad, because in retrospect it was usually very good advice, with the best of intentions. In the grand scheme of things, though, I think it is better if you just keep your freaking opinion to yourself, and let me flail through life my way. I'll figure it out eventually.
And, no, I never attended welding school. No, I was an untrained, uneducated wildcat welder, helping someone put up an awning on River Street. I did wear my goggles, though.